Monday, 11 September 2017

Evil Ratbag

When you were little, were you an innocent wee darling or an evil ratbag? Well me, I was an evil ratbag at times. I know it's hard to believe looking at me now, but I got up to some mischief.

It all started when I had reached my terrible twos. Back then my cousins lived in Australia and every year we would go and stay at their house for about two weeks. One day, there was a dreadful smell wafting around the house and the whole family was searching high and low to find out where this stench was coming from.

Put yourself in my position, I’m two years old, fresh out of nappies and in a strange house. With a guilty look on my face, I hung my head in shame as Mum came across my little brown surprise I had squished in the back corner of my cousin’s wardrobe. I wondered why there was no toilet paper in there!

How many of us have younger brothers or sisters we love to mess with?

When I was five and my little brother Jackson was three, I found a fairly large suitcase in the garage and that gave me an idea ………..

I told Jackson that I had a game where he hops in the suitcase and I wheel him around and of course he was keen. I thought to myself this plan is coming together perfectly.

He climbed in the suitcase with excitement and prepared for the ride of his life. I zipped it up so there would be no peeking and I started to wheel him down the long driveway. It's surprising how heavy a skinny three year old can be. Lucky the case had good wheels!

Finally I had reached my destination.  I carefully placed the suitcase next to the letterbox then I skipped back inside with an evil smirk on my face………….

As I casually plopped on the couch to watch some tv, Mum and Dad asked me if I knew where Jackson was? “I don't know” I said, but with the guilty grin on my face Mum and Dad knew I was up to something. “Where is Jackson?” Mum repeated. I figured that I had better come clean and let them know that Jackson had wheeled himself out to the letterbox to get picked up by the postie! Mum was so grateful that I told her.

Childhood memories remind you of times that were weird, funny, embarrassing and mischievous. Nowadays everything we do and every place we go, someone will be there to video it, take a photo, or write about it on Facebook. So some of those embarrassing memories we would rather forget will haunt us forever.

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